Beware of the Yeti.

How do you know things are bad with your legacy family?

Exhibit A -  Suicide by weird CC pillows: (Heidi)

Exhibit B - Suicide by filthy freakin' bathtub: (Jenna)

Pfft. You just can't buy these people nice stuff. I won't be surprised if I open my game one day to an entire house covered with moldy green goo.

  

You might want to try that bath out somewhere else, hun. I'm not sure you can count yourself as TRULY clean after you bathed in a funk-pit.

Elsewheres in the house...

 

We have a very melancholy looking Adrienne. I think she is still adjusting...y'know...to being...

O-L-D.

;-)

Plus, it makes it even harder when you even have the yard ornaments making fun of you:

 Carmelo: "Y'don't say! The old lady still has the brain power to play chess? Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!" 

 Eventually, Heidi fought the CC pillows and won. She managed to get out of bed just in time to call Beau and invite him out.

So, she changed in to something a little more appropriate...

And headed on down to Waylon's.

Beau, as always, was taking his sweet time. Of course, it's not his fault that he lives in an apartment building, and apparently EA sucks at making elevators. I think it takes him an average of three days to get down to his bottom floor. But that's just a rough estimate.

Heidi had a lot of time to stand around and think about life, and important things in general:

She eventually had to go inside and get something to eat before she died of starvation waiting on Beau. Of course, given the amount of time it normally takes for him to get anywhere, it's possible that I could have grown Shayna up, given her enough cooking skill to make ambrosia, had Youssef's ghost catch a deathfish, harvested a perfect life fruit (from the garden of Jenna's grandchildren) and brought Heidi back before Beau even had a chance to know any difference.

However, that sounds like entirely too much work, so I opted for the onion rings.

Beau eventually showed up, just in time to share Heidi's snack. (Isn't she so generous?)

...I hate cell phones. I'm bad enough at in-game pictures as it is, I don't need them ringing to make it even worse. :-|

Beau's a really good sport, isn't he? Maybe I should have ordered him plasma fruit rings instead, just to be nice.

...nope. I think it's funny to watch to watch him choke down greasy bar food for no apparent reason.

They then went on to watch Jett Atkins pound out a tune on the piano. I think he hit every chord but the right one. However, it doesn't seem to matter, Heidi must be tone deaf, as she appears to be enjoying it:

 

Yeah, you know it had to happen. There's nothing more I love than to show up at a dive bar in my ball gown.

As you can see, Heidi was feeling flirty, but Beau was starting to think that the place was a little crowded.

...there could be a reason to that.

 

(hint: it isn't my simself's beehive)

See, that girl there is his GIRLFRIEND. And a cop, to boot. It's too bad I can't remember her name, although it really doesn't matter. They are actually enemies. Which means he would rather be in the presence of garbage.

Usually that doesn't happen until AFTER you get married, right? :-P

Clearly, this is an uncomfortable situation. 

And, wouldn't you know, it was a spectacular time for Beau to glitch out and get stuck in the floor. I hate when that happens to me.

Beau thought that this could end in nothing but disaster, but Heidi obviously found it terribly entertaining.

Eventually, Beau made his way out of the floor, and they decided to go elsewhere:

And, as if I needed anymore proof that Beau was "the one" for Heidi:

He's perfect for the family!! I should have a private wedding now. :-D

...but I won't. I'll just let them dance instead:

 

I'm starting to think that Lady Cook is stuck right there. I swear, every time I come into the Aquarius, she is in that exact spot, doing that exact dance. Kinda spooky. She's like the Judy Bunch of Bridgeport...except she's not deformed, and instead of eating...she's dancing. (sort of.)

Of course, all good things must come to an end, and soon enough...it's time for the club to close. So, you know what that means:

 

MAD DASH TO THE ELEVATOR!!!

 

...there really is no point to this picture other than patting myself on the back for a plastic surgery job well done.  :-)

Heidi went home to a nice bath:

 

Gah. You would think one of the lazy assholes who live in this house would clean that tub. Or at least the maid, right? I don't really know if those shorts are a wonky CC issue, or Heidi put them on in an effort to not contract some sort of fatal disease.

Heidi is displeased with her beautiful surroundings. Go figure snobby sims. I guess cause I haven't redecorated in the PAST THREE DAYS.

She is, however, mighty pleased with her stinkin' self:

Why, even her hands are the epitome of beautiful-ness. How gorgeous.

She can't help but wonder about that Beau, though...she finds herself thinking about him all of the time. Strange, huh? He's almost...magical. ;-)

This particular morning, he asks her back to his place.

I know, I know, Beau. But it can't be helped. It's just her nature. Besides, she's eyeballing YOU now. ;-)

 

This is the part of the story when I should have been able to tell you all the interesting things that happened when she was at his house.

But I can't.

Because it was at this point that my game decided to go all ape-shit on me for some reason.

I can't say EXACTLY, but I can almost pinpoint it to when I decided to retire Adrienne from her job.

Weird things started happening.

She looks like Stretch Armstrong. :-(

Also, the whole family started doing weird things:

 

Is this normal? I have never retired a sim before. I'm totally confused. Their status was "cheer." 

...but what's with the abominable snowman? 

Are they celebrating her retirement? Or are they protesting the yeti?

Should I be scared??! :-P

Eventually Shayna went back to normal size and they all stopped doing...whatever the hell it was they were doing.

Everything was normal again.

See? Normal. Phew.

However, at this point, I was so annoyed that I just brought Heidi home from Beau's and shut my whole game off. Sometimes, ya just have to step away from the computer, y'know?

Beau has a talent for showing up completely out of nowhere. And while her phone is ringing.

They stayed outside for a little while, having a little chat about all of the things that they don't have because Sims 3 isn't at Sims 2 awesomeness level, yet:

Elsewhere in the family, it's time for another important decision:

Jenna is moving out. I suck at playing with her, so I'm letting her take her chances with story progression. It was my goal to find suitable mates for all of my legacy children before I sent them out on their own...but...I fear she will be an old maid before I can be bothered to do anything with her, other than letting her sit on the couch in her nightie and watch TV.

...so out she goes.

Bye, Jenna. If it's any consolation, you were my second favorite. And should Heidi not be able to fulfill her duties as heiress, you will be next in line. ;-) ('Cause I'm not looking at Dallas' sour face for the rest of him sim-life.)

 

I would prefer him *actually* sweeping than just standing around chatting about it. Although, he's obviously better than those silly girls they keep sending. At least the toilet isn't filthy. :-)

Surprisingly, there was an awards ceremony going on downtown, for Adrienne. *LOADS* of people show up.

(FYI - If this doesn't show how freakin' glitchy Bridgeport is, I don't know what does. I have had awards ceremonies in every town in the game, and just about every dang-blasted sim ever created shows up. Here we have 4 or 5. So, people can say it's my computer if they want, maybe it is. But if it is, it has to be caused by the graphics overload that is Bridgeport. /rant)

 

Isn't Elspeth's outfit grand? I must meet her stylist. I went around Bridgeport and made darn near everyone look perfect, and then they go and age up and look worse than ever. *grumbles*

On another note, we won't have our pigeons for very long if we cause the to choke on sim-fetti, now, will we? :-P

Adrienne was excited about my Lola Belle makeover, so she tried to take a picture. But I think she was distracted by Kirby Wise's poor choice of outfit, and was probably thinking to herself that she was in worse need of a makeover than Lola. :-P (I know that's what *I* was thinking.)

Anyways, back to my girl and her Beau:

They were busy standing outside The Grind, having a deep conversation.

Who needs the meaning of life when you have black and purple? (Excuse me: SPICEBERRY) I know they dominate  99% of my daily conversations.

They would have been content just standing around outside, making out...

But I made them go inside. There were lots of interesting folks hanging around. And it must have been Halloween, or something:

Burglar clown? I'm not real sure. Jenna would have fainted and perished. She's scared of clowns. And burglars. :-D

Sexy schoolgirl?

Bwahahah. Fail.

Heidi found this mildly amusing:

I tried to get her and Beau to dance a little.

 

But they always have other plans:

Ain't it sweet?

Work always ruins things, though. It was time to go.

 

But before we go, I beg of you:

What is wrong with this lady's body? It makes me cry!

While they were at work, I found Adrienne in a sticky situation:

Broken dishwasher.

Floor covered in water.

Wish to repair it.

...

Negative.

I haven't kept her this long to fry her little simmie brains out. :-P I think she deserves better, don't you?

I had her call a repairman.

After work, Beau took Heidi to the diner to satisfy her weak humanly needs.

After which, she decided that it was time for him to meet her family...so she invited him over.

 

Of course, at this point. it's 7 am, and everyone just went to bed, because...this is the BRAXTON household, you know.

They found a way to occupy themselves.

And, since no one was awake, aside from Shayna:

(Who, at this point, some of you probably don't even remember. I've been terrible about featuring the poor dear. Oh well, at least I gave her cute pajamas)

They decided to take the show elsewhere:

I don't know why they chose Dallas' old room. I guess Beau is too manly to woohoo in a pink bed. 

They look sort of awkward, don't they?

First time jitters. :-P

It didn't take them long to get the hang of it, though:

Of course, who should show up at their door at a most opportune moment?

...if you guessed FeliciaSim...

...

...

...

...

You're WRONG!

Burglar clown! For all of your first-time-woohoo celebratory needs.

What? You didn't order a burglar clown for yours?

(Hey...Vlad...Jenna lives across the street. Go give her a visit. And take pictures. :-D)

Anyways, Heidi was all woohoo'd out...and Beau apparently wasn't. So...he got dressed...

 

And made his way home.

Look at that strut. He's rather pleased with himself, no? :-D

Well, folks, that's it for today...but before we go...I thought you  might be interested in a few tidbits from Story Progression:

-Dallas is pretty boring. But as far as I know he and Elvira Slayer are still going strong. I see him out playing his guitar for money all of the time. 

-Jenna wasted no time at all. First thing she did was go after Bronson Littler. I suspect she and Heidi won't be repairing their relationship anytime soon, but hey...I think Heidi got the better end of the bargain.

-FeliciaSim and Matthew Hamming have a very rocky relationship. Although, I'm tempted to make it official, as she has a bad habit of using Harry Marks as a rebound, and I find that very uncomfortable for me.

-I found tons of stolen goods in my family inventory courtesy of Dallas' kleptomaniac trait. Anyone need a toilet paper roll holder or a newspaper stand? :-D

Have a great day, everyone!! :-D

(I wish I knew how to send subliminal messages forcing you to comment.) :-P